What Not to Wear (Canadian Style Edition)

This. This is what not to wear if you want to look like a Canadian. This is anti – Canadian style. Do NOT wear this if you want to blend in. You will most definitely stand out in an outfit this horribly wrong.

Canadian style in the winter.

Canadian Style: Bottoms

The only thing right about this outfit is the denim. Canadians feel most at home in blue jean fabric. To be completely honest, this particular pair of jeans is all wrong. The cut is too “right now” and the colour isn’t that highly-desired Wrangler blue. To achieve the valued Canadian denim look, one must dress head to toe in denim, and this is simply not enough. Canadian jeans must be a traditional bootcut. Bonus points if it has bedazzled western flap pockets and white stitching. Extra bonus points if jeans are worn with 2008 skate shoes and/or actual cowboy boots.

Those shoes are clearly socks. They’re not even real shoes (aka boots – because what are the point of shoes otherwise). Please keep socks hidden in public.

Canadian Style: Tops

And don’t even get me started on the hat. A beret? Like where are we, Paris?Luckily, Canadian style dictates that toques are mandatory, to be worn indoors and out, year round. This clearly violates this policy.

Canadian Style - visiting Banff National Park in the winter.

While there is elements of plaid on this outfit, it is not bright enough. Traditional Canadian style plaid is typically red, green, or blue, and in a flannel fabric. The look is very reminiscent of lumber jack chic.

Fortunately, this purse (Canadians don’t say handbag, that would be too fashion forward) works. It’s green, like our forests. It seems quite practical and sturdy. Although, a backpack with a Canadian flag on it would be more acceptable. Hopefully it’s made of real leather (doubtful) #Albertabeef.

No one who excels at Canadian style would wear a pink sweater like that. It’s clearly not a hoodie (or a bunny hug if you live in Saskatchewan) and has no logo across the chest. What’s the point of a sweater if it doesn’t say where you got it from? No true Canadian actually needs a sweater to keep warm.

What kind of coat is that? A cardigan? Every self-respecting Canadian knows you wear you ski jacket over everything from October to May. Even if it’s flip-flop weather, you’d better just bring the ski jacket anyways and wear it unbuttoned.

Overall, I give this outfit a zero out of ten, and that’s spelled zed-ee-argh-oh.

Canadian Style in the winter - visiting Banff in the winter.

I hope this post has given you some insight on Canadian style. Please follow these guidelines if you wish to visit Canada in the winter. Do not follow the outfit shown as a style, but instead use it as an example of what not to wear instead.

**Disclaimer

I hope you’ve realized that this is a parody. If this is actually your style, I’m sorry in the most Canadian way possible and hope I don’t offend you. No Canadians were harmed in the making of this blog post.

Canadian style in the winter.

Shop this post: beretscarfsweater – coat (last seen here) – tights for keeping warmthis amazing pair of denim – handbag (old, no dupes) – booties

If you do like the traditional Canadian look, I’ve found some stylish alternatives to shop:

4 Comments

  1. Haley
    January 23, 2019 / 10:17 pm

    You are to funny!! No Canadians were harmed in the making of this post ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’•

    • catekittlitz
      Author
      January 23, 2019 / 11:04 pm

      Bahaha thank you ๐Ÿ˜Š

  2. September 2, 2019 / 5:17 pm

    I am Canadian and I mostly disagree with you (although you are partially correct). My more rural friends would never dress this polished. They do flannel, hoodies, jeans, etc… But we mostly wore puffy parkas… However, I grew up wearing berets, and if you are French Canadian you probably did too, or something trimmed with a fox pom pom. We wore school uniform plaids, or our provincial plaids… I pretty much never wore jeans, and certainly nothing as you described, which would be “the prairies” not West, East, or Northern Canada ๐Ÿ :). And while puffy parkas, and sporty rain wear were the norm on the West Coast, East Coast Canadians like their wool peacoats, and New England style trenchcoats,and were more likely to wear vests than West Coasters (unless, ashamed to say, the vest is fleece or something).

    • catekittlitz
      Author
      September 2, 2019 / 5:37 pm

      I am Canadian too, but Iโ€™m a west coaster so all of my stereotypes reflect what I grew up with in BC, Alberta, and Saskatchewan! I definitely agree that Easterners have a different dress. This is also meant to be a spoof article ๐Ÿ™‚ as well as show what I enjoy wearing, which differs from many of my West coast friends.

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